Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Letter to my future self.



 So, I wrote a letter to myself, that I will get back on graduation. It's kind of personal, which would be why it's under a cut. ouo

Dear future self,
                                    Today, you are graduating. You’ve managed to make it this far. Be proud of yourself. You’ve earned this. You have come a long way. You were once a scared little freshman at Gilbert, working hard to make something of yourself. Then you became a sophomore, terrified of the new school and being around so many people. Do you remember that? Do you also remember meeting your best friend, McKayla, and all of the other amazing friends you’ve made here? Do you remember the Christmas talent show that year, when you sang in front of the whole school? You finally managed to break your stage fright. You should be proud of that. Do you remember all of the fun times at lunch and all of the sleepovers and time you’ve spent with your best friends? Nothing could be any better than that. Do you remember the worst part of your depression? Can you look back on it now and smile because you know that it made you stronger? I really hope you can. 

Do you remember junior year, when you finally decided what you want to do after high school? I hope you’ve kept those plans. Basically, I want you to always remember everything you’ve learned so far. Your past does not define you. Though you’ve been through a lot, you can still do whatever you want to do. Just because you were broken once, it doesn’t mean you’ll never be whole again. You have people around you that love you even when you don’t think you deserve to be loved. You are a wonderful person, even though I know you probably still don’t believe that. Let go of your regrets. You regret a lot and blame everything on yourself, at least I’m assuming you still do, but you’re wrong. Everything that has happened is not your fault. Start living your life. 

Let go of all the time you’ve spent worrying and crying and being confused and just start living. You deserve it. You really do. Follow your dreams. I know deep down inside there’s a lot you want to do, though you never really planned on doing a lot of it it. But it’s time. Live your life, chase your dreams, and most of all, be happy. I know that sounds silly coming from me since I’m rarely happy, but you deserve happiness. It’s time you work toward it. You know you want to. My advice to you is this; get out of this state. I know you hate it here, although the wonderful people have made up for that. Just leave, go somewhere new, somewhere you can be on your own and find yourself. It’ll happen sooner than you think. Learn to let go. Let go of the past and the pain and heartbreak. You’re not broken anymore. 

As cliché as this is going to sound, follow your heart. You know what you want better than anyone else. Be happy. Always look back on the good times, and smile when you remember them all. These are memories you should cherish. Let your walls down. People can only hurt you if you give them the power to do so. You’re going to be just fine. Just live, alright? For once in your life, just live. Stop with all of the sadness and hurt. You are alive. You are well. You are on the right path. Keep going. You’ve made it this far, and now there’s no point in stopping. 

Today is going to be one of the happiest and saddest days of your life. It’s bittersweet, isn’t it? But you’ve done it. You’ve made it. You’re graduating and soon you’ll be living your life, and you will be happy. Trust me. All of your hard work is finally paying off. I’m proud of you, and you should be proud of yourself, too. Everything you’re worried about isn’t going to happen. So just relax, and breathe, and smile. Like I said, it’s time to be happy. So when you walk across that stage, I want you to smile and think of all the good times. Think of sleepovers, and having a best friend you could cry to, and all of the laughs and smiles. Be nostalgic. Never forget that you can be anyone and do anything you want to do. It’s time to begin your life. Have fun. Be happy. Keep going. You’re going to be great.

                                    Love,
                                    Your past self

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