Patricia Massari

Patricia Massari awoke to the sound of her alarm clock going off, the familiar beeping resounding throughout her bedroom.  It was Tuesday morning. She had had a difficult night, staying up late to study for yet another college test. Her husband, Louis, was already out of bed and standing by the ironing board in the corner of the room. He was ironing her clothes, making sure they were perfect. Sitting up in bed, she smiled at him. “Good morning,” she said, then rose from the bed and picked up a bag off the floor, carrying it off to the bathroom with her. She had a very special reason to be awake so early other than getting ready for work; she was going to take a pregnancy test. The bathroom door closed behind her and she crossed over to the toilet, opening the test with shaky hands and going through the usual procedure that goes along with it. On one hand she wanted to be a mother but at the same time she didn’t. She quite honestly did not know what to feel; both excitement and nervousness radiated through her body.

                The test was laid upon the sink as Patricia waited for the news that could possibly change their lives. Looking down, her eyes locked onto her stomach and she thought about what it would look like with a little bump. What if there was a baby growing inside of her? They were still in college! She had a job and her husband had a job. Adding a baby into the mix would be too much, wouldn’t it? They were only twenty five years old and had only been married for two years. Was it too soon? Several minutes passed before she had the courage to pick the test up and look at the results, but she finally did. The little plus sign caused her breath to catch in her throat. She was pregnant. 

                Tears began pooling in her eyes and she tried to hold them back, but it was no use. She was pregnant. She was going to be a mother. Not bothering to wipe away her tears, Patricia walked back out of the bathroom to break the news to Louis. “Louis,” she began with tears still running down her cheeks, “I’m pregnant.” The words hung in the air as she waited for it to sink in. “What are we going to do, Louis?” Louis stood there in shock, Patricia’s words finally registering in his mind. He was going to be a father.  

                “Trish, don’t worry. It’s going to be okay.” He sounded so sure of this, and that comforted Patricia. Both of them dabbed their tears away and Louis wrapped his arms around his wife, hugging her close to him. “It’s going to be okay,” he repeated, “we’re going to be okay. There’s no doubt that I want this baby and I know you want it too. It’s ours.” Louis was excited, that much was obvious. “I know you’re right, it’s just so much to take in,” Patricia explained before glancing over at the clock. “I’m going to be late for work if I don’t get dressed!” Louis chuckled and picked up her clothes off of the ironing board. “I ironed them for you. Here, go get dressed.”

                Patricia walked back into the bathroom and changed out of her pajamas and into the outfit that Louis had laid out and ironed for her. Rushing back out into the bedroom she grabbed her bag and slipped her shoes on. “I’ll pick up another test on the way to work, just to make sure. I’ll call you once I take it.” Louis kissed his wife goodbye. Patricia made her way out of the front door and began walking the streets to work. She would have just enough time to pick up a test and make it to the office. 

                A few blocks down she walked into a store. After picking up and paying for a pregnancy test, she continued on her way to work, her thoughts racing through her mind. Was she really going to be a mother? That thought alone was enough to both scare and excite her. Would she be a good mother? Would she know what to do? Would her child grow up, happy and healthy? 

                Her mind was a jumbled up place by the time she made it to the North Tower and walked inside. She went to the elevator and settled in for the long ride up to the ninety-eighth floor of the building. People came and went, but she wasn’t paying attention to them. Her mind was still racing. She wanted the baby, if she really was pregnant, but was she ready for something like that? Was she ready to be responsible for another person? Anticipation was making her nervous as she finally made it to the correct floor and stepped off of the elevator and into the office where she worked. 

Marsh & McLennan had become a second home to her. She was a capital analyst for the firm and she loved what she did. Patricia waved at some of the other workers and made her way over to the restroom; her hands were shaking as she reached into her bag and pulled out the second pregnancy test. Her whole body was wracked with nerves and it was apparent on her face that she was scared. This test would let her know for sure if she was expecting or not. 

She walked into a stall and hung her bag on the back of the door before taking the second test, going through the same procedure once more. Now if she could just wait five minutes…. Those five minutes were the longest five minutes of her life. Fingers still shaking, she picked up the test and glanced down at the little window on it. Another little plus sign had appeared. She was definitely pregnant. She was sure of it now. This time she didn’t cry; a smile appeared on her lips and her hand dropped instinctively to her stomach to rest on it. Her baby was in there. 

She walked back out of the restroom and over to her desk. According to the clock on the wall it was 8:42 a.m. Perfect! Louis would still be at home, she realized, as she dialed her home number. As soon as she heard him answer, she began speaking, happily gushing about the news.  

“I’m pregnant! We’re pregnant! We’re having a baby!” There was no denying her happiness now. “

“We’re pregnant? You’re positive?”

“Yes!” Patricia happily exclaimed, grinning ear to ear.

“Oh Patricia, we’re going to be so happy, just you and me and the baby,” Louis replied.

“I know we will be,” Patricia said, but her train of thought was cut short. 

It was 8:46 a.m. Something in the background caught Patricia’s attention. It was a sound that did not belong. 

One of her hands was laid on her stomach, protectively.  The sound of an engine humming echoed in the distance. It was moving closer. “Oh… My… God-“ The line went dead. It was in that exact second that the first plane crashed into the tower. 

One final breath escaped her lips. Her heart beat one final time. Her hand never left her stomach as the floor fell in beneath her.